The Tenets I'm Trying To Live By

If you're familiar with my Blogger Spotlight posts, I like to ask my guests what principles they live by. I don't know, it's something that I find interesting. That being said, I've never really shared what principles I see as very important. Well, not as a cohesive post anyways. As you can see, these are the principles I'm trying to live by, trying being the key word here. I'm not perfect and I certainly don't want to come off like I am.

I've always been quite a sensitive person (I still am) and I think this is where my desire to be kind stemmed from. When I was younger, I was crushed anytime anyone was cruel to me and so I guess it was a no-brainer that I decided that I didn't want to be cruel. Even the Bible says that you should do unto others what you want them to do to you.

Now that I'm older, I believe it goes deeper than that.We should be kind, just because. I'm not kind all the time, I feel like that's somewhat humanly impossible. I also had my fair share of 'mean girl' moments in high school. But I want to be 'almost always' kind. When I think of really nice things that people have done for/ said to me, it fills me with a warm fuzzy feeling and I smile. I think it's really nice to have that sort of effect on people. One thing that I'm doing in my quest to be kinder is stopping myself from snapping or making a snarky comment when I feel it coming. It can be so easy to let it slip (like I often do) especially when it comes to family. Family members, nuclear and extended, tend to strike a certain nerve and it's quite commonplace to be snippier than you would be with other people. I like to pause a little before saying what I want to say. That really helps because your tone can also make a difference when it comes to being kind/cruel. I don't always get it right but I'm working on it!                                             

This goes hand in hand with kindness. Empathy is the ability to understand the feelings of others. Or in other words, the ability to put yourself in the shoes of others. In this social media generation, we're all able to give our opinions on any and everything. I've definitely noticed that sometimes, people aren't very empathetic, myself included. It's easy to know what to do in a situation when you're on the outside looking in.We talk about how we would have done this or that if we were the ones but is it ever that easy?

Of course, being empathetic doesn't mean you shouldn't tell people the hard truth or tell them when they mess up. But, when saying this, we need to remember that these are real people with real feelings. I'll use the #VisaBae situation as an example. Sure, she was in the wrong and could have avoided that situation. But, a lot of people on Twitter and Instagram insulted her and stuff. I found it so unnecessary. You can tell someone the cold, hard truth whilst still putting yourself in their shoes.

I never want to be an uptight person who has no sense of humour. I love to laugh and I want to always laugh. I also want to be a person who can take a joke (to a certain extent sha) and laugh at herself. Laughter makes everyone feel better and I think it's so necessary in this crazy world that we live in. My friend Daniella gave me this tip and it's been really helpful. I DM (direct message) myself funny videos or tweets on Twitter and when I'm feeling a bit 'meh' or just in the mood for a good laugh, I go watch/read them. I do this instead of 'liking' the tweets because I like a mix of funny and serious stuff so it's quite tedious to find the funny stuff when I want it.

I wrote a post on giving and the various ways we can all give last year. Giving more was one of my goals for the year but if I'm being honest, I've really been slacking. Sometimes, I feel like if I'm not giving money then I haven't really done much. But that's so not true. I can give my time, I can help others, I can share my knowledge, there's so much that I (and you) can do. If you would like to know how you can give, please read the post I linked above. I'm going to give it another read too!

One time in church, the pastor suggested having a book where you write down all the things God has done for you. That way, when things are tough, you can go back and read it and remember to be grateful. I personally think it's a brilliant idea. And you don't even have to be a Christian or religious to do this. Having a book where you write down the great things that have happened to you helps you to stay grateful and it can also be very encouraging in trying times. I'm not very consistent with my documenting and the dates between posts are very wide sometimes but it's nice to go back and read what I've written. It's so easy to forget the good things that have happened to us when things aren't so great, it's completely normal too in my opinion. So, having a book/journal like that really helps to remind me to be grateful.

So there you have it guys, these are the tenets I'm trying to live by. They're nothing ground-breaking but I just thought to share. What are some of your rules?


  1. Yes to humour girl. Who wants a stiff and boring life? Definitely not me. I have learnt to give without expecting and to also show my utmost gratitude for even the smallest things. I need to improve on being totally kind though.
    Beautiful post, I love!

    1. Thank you Gift! :)
      No stiff and boring life for me either, haha. Giving without expecting anything is really important, glad you touched on that. Good luck with everything! xx

  2. These are great tenets to live by. I keep telling people you don't need a reason to be kind to others, something as little as smiling, can go a really long way in making someone's day. I'm trying to incorporate then into my life, especially empathy and gratitude.
    I hope you are having a wonderful week.

    www lilyofnigeria.com

    1. Thank you Lily! You're spot on, even a smile can life someone's spirit. I know it lifts mine! Hope you're having a lovely week too :)


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