2.17.2018

Daughters Who Walk This Path: A Book Review

We do not abandon the business of living life just because of what people will say about us.
This quote from Yejide Kilanko's book; Daughters Who Walk This Path resonated with me so much that I had to write it down. Daughters Who Walk This Path has been on my to-read list since 2015. I was at a friend's house and her dad had a copy of the book. I randomly flipped through it and it looked really good so I added it to my ever-growing list of books to read. I finally ordered it on Amazon (a used copy) and here's my review.

Name of Book: Daughters Who Walk This Path
Author: Yejide Kilanko

Year of Publication: 2012
Daughters Who Walk This Path Book Review
Summary
Spirited and intelligent, Morayo grows up surrounded by school friends and family in busy, modern-day Ibadan, Nigeria. An adoring little sister, their traditional parents, and a host of aunties and cousins make Morayo's home their own. So there's nothing unusual about her charming but troubled cousin Bros T moving in with the family.
At first, Morayo and her sister are delighted, but in her innocence, nothing prepares Morayo for the shameful secret Bros T forces upon her. Thrust into a web of oppressive silence woven by the adults around her, Morayo must learn to fiercely protect herself and her sister from a legacy of silence many women in Morayo's family share. Only Aunty Morenike—once shielded by her own mother—provides Morayo with a safe home and a sense of female community that sustains her as she grows into a young woman in bustling, politically charged, often violent Nigeria.

Review
My friend Chiamaka (who has a lovely book review blog by the way) describes the book as predictable. I somewhat agree with her in the sense that you're not eagerly thumbing through wondering what's going to happen next. Now,  when I say that I don't mean it's a book that isn't compelling to read. That would be false seeing as I read it pretty quickly. What I mean is that there are no crazy plot twists or heart racing what-happens-next moments and that's totally fine. You guys know I love a good plot twist but not every book needs one.

Daughters Who Walk This Path was heart-wrenching and hard to read sometimes.  It's difficult to talk about it without giving away spoilers. What I would say is that Morayo's ordeal was already traumatic enough but the deafening silence of people around her and her parents, in particular, made it even worse.  I'm Nigerian and so I can only speak as such. The culture of silence that is prevalent in the Nigerian society when it comes to sexual abuse or any form of abuse, in general, is not only unhelpful, it's also very damaging. I'm really glad that things are changing, not only in Nigeria but worldwide. Women (and men) are speaking out about their experiences and are refusing to be hushed. Time's truly up.

There were a lot of great points in this book and I wrote some of them down as I read so I could share them on here.
  • In our culture, women are blamed for things that are beyond their control. The onus is always on women to make everything perfect. For example, in the book, Bisoye (Morayo's mother) is blamed for Eniayo's (Morayo's little sister) condition at birth. That made me shake my head because such things still happen. It's like when some people blame women for not having sons. Or when a couple can't have kids, some people automatically put the blame on the woman. The crazy thing is that even some educated people take part in this so one can't even excuse it as ignorance sometimes. 
  • "It will be difficult to find a husband with those bowed legs." One of Morayo's aunts said that to her in the book and I felt so bad. I feel like some adults are so cruel to children and they don't understand how damaging such unkind comments can be. There are things adults said to me when I was a child and I haven't forgotten. It doesn't hurt me any more of course, but I still remember.
  • "A man of means in the midst of fifty paupers is a pauper too." This was also a quote in the book and it's so true. It's a great reminder that we all need to empower and lift up the people around us whenever we can. 
  • Bros T did a lot of problematic things in this book, even as a child. The reason he was able to get away with it all was because of his mother. Of course, you should always believe your child first. But if different people including the child's grandomther have been complaining about something he or she does for YEARS and you keep on defending him blindly without doing any investigation, I think it's dumb. Nobody wants to believe their child is bad or whatever but sometimes, logic is needed.
  • When Morayo was in high school, she and her friends talked about boys, sex, and whatnot. The outrageous things that they were told by their mothers made me roll my eyes and chuckle at the same time. e.g. Tomi's mother told her that if she let a boy touch her, she would smell it on her.  A lot of times, sex education is full of threats and scaremongering instead of actual useful information. Young boys and girls have a lot of misinformation that can be pretty damaging in the end.
These are some of the points I got from reading the book. There are so many other lessons and interesting bits but I can't possibly list them all! 

Conclusion
As I mentioned before, this book was hard to read for me sometimes. It made me sad, made me angry and made me smile too. So in essence, I felt the full range of emotions whilst reading this. Another part of this book I particularly enjoyed is the 'romance' part, it actually had me grinning like an idiot. It wasn't even that deep, I'm just a sucker for romance. So yes, that's it I believe. I loved reading this and I'm so glad I bought it. 

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26 comments

  1. seem like an interesting book. I want to read more stories this year. I will look it up on Amazon. thanks for sharing :-)

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    1. It really is, I hope you enjoy it. Thank you Destiny :)

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  2. Great review! i have actually never heard of the book before but i'll add it to my never ending list ( so help me God!). The first thing that caught my eyes is the fact that the book is set in Ibadan and there's just something i love about Nigerian themed stories in general. The fact that its set in the west just makes me relate more and i feel represented in the literary world lol.
    You mentioned some points you got from the book and the diffeent emotions you felt whilst reading it and this just reminds me of Stay with me by Ayobami Adebayo.
    I hope i can get my hands on a copy soon. Great Job Demi!

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    1. Haha trust me, I can relate to a never ending book list! Same here, I love to read books set in other cultures but I'm always drawn to Nigerian books. Arrgh I still think about your review of Stay With Me, need to get it ASAP. Thank you Tola :)

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  3. Sounds like a very interesting book. I have a goal to read one book every months and I think this would be a nice one. Great post.

    www.rshanphonsi.com

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    1. Good luck with your goal Shasha and I hope you enjoy the book :)

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  4. Thanks for sharing it! I'm always looking for new books to read!

    Raindrops of Sapphire

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    1. Happy Tuesday! I realised my comment before only sent through in part. I wanted to add to it that I agree how damaging adult comments can be to children and it is sad that women get blamed all the time for things that are beyond control. It's nobody's fault. Even though I am always looking for new books to read, I don't think I could read this one as it seems too emotional for me.

      Raindrops of Sapphire

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    2. Thanks for stopping by Lorna! :)

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    3. It really can be damaging to kids, more people need to realize that. Aww I totally understand, it made me quite emotional tbh. Thanks Lorna :)

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  5. Never heard of the author. Def checking this out on Amazon. Thanks for sharing.

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    1. Yay, hope you enjoy! Thank you for reading :)

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  6. So interesting! Great post!

    https://chicglamstyle.com

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  7. This book sounds interesting, I haven't had time to read, it was one of my new year's resolutions to start reading again. I have so many books on my list!

    Yiota
    https://pinkdaisyloves.blogspot.com.cy/

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  8. I recommend just picking one book that stands out the most to you on your list and reading a little of it everyday. Thanks for stopping by Yiota! :)

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  9. Insightful article but what caught my eye the most is that quote at the beginning. Just what I need at the moment. :-) :-* :-)

    www.rshanphonsi.com

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  10. That quote is quite something isn't it? I fell in love with it the first time I read it and it definitely applies to my life right now. Glad it had the same effect on you, thanks for reading :)

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  11. This seems like a very important story, and especially relevant considering the discourse nowadays. // @ the last point: it's so important to have open conversations! It reminds me of the TED Talk "What we don't teach kids about sex" -Audrey | Brunch at Audrey's

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    1. Ooh I've never heard of that talk, will look it up ASAP. Thank you Audrey! :)

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  12. I enjoyed reading this review and I particularly liked the point you brought out about some adults saying cruel things to kids. I also remember some things I was told as a child and for a long time I struggled with the insecurities brought about by those words. I think some use it as a way of dealing with their own insecurity, hurt those who cannot hurt you back. This book has equally been on my to read list for a long time, I hope I read it before the end of this year. Can you please drop your goodreads username? Thanks

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    1. Cruel words said to children can definitely lead to insecurity, it's something I struggled with as well. Exactly, they're picking on people they know cannoy fight back which is so twisted and sad. It's a good read!

      My Good Reads name is Demilade Aina :)

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  13. I've heard a lot about this book, I'll add it to my list.

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    1. It's totally worth the read, thanks for stopping by Feyi! :)

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  14. I honestly want to read this book now. I love any book that highlighys on the struggles women face in a society that oppresses them

    Lemonadesociety.blogspot.com

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    1. I know for a fact you'll enjoy it Anniedora! :)

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I read and appreciate every single comment. I'll definitely check out your blog. ❤

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