10.18.2017

Connecting The Dots Backwards

Hey guys,
Today's post is quite short. I had this yearning in my heart to share this with you all, I hope it helps someone out there. I apologize if everything isn't coherent, sometimes it's difficult to write what I feel haha. Enjoy. xx

Recently, I was talking to my friend Chiamaka and we were reminiscing about our high school days. We laughed at ourselves, about how naïve we were and moaned about how life was so simple back then compared to now. It got me thinking of all my friends.  We had so many plans you know? Our entire lives were mapped out completely. We knew what we wanted to study, the grades we were going to get, what schools we would go to, where we would go on holiday and so many more things.


When I think about all of this, it makes me chuckle and it makes me a bit sad at the same time. It's safe to say that almost three years later, nothing has gone according to our 'plan'. It's one thing to hear people tell you that life never goes according to  plan but it's another thing to experience it for yourself. It's definitely been an eye-opener and has taught me a very valuable lesson, life owes you absolutely nothing.

To a degree, we all carry this sense of entitlement when it comes to what we believe we 'deserve'. And the truth is, we really shouldn't have that mentality, it only sets you up for heartbreak and disappointment. I speak from experience when I say that.

I'm not saying we shouldn't plan, I don't think I could live without planning.What I'm saying is that we should be aware that life owes us nothing and sometimes things don't go according to our plan. And when that happens, it's for a reason as cliché as that sounds. I'm a Christian and I believe God has a plan for me and so when things don't go my way, it hurts but I like to keep at the back of my mind that it has happened for a reason. So when shit hits the fan and you see your wonderful plan tearing apart, be upset for a while but keep on keeping on. I agree, it's very easy to say but much harder to do and I know this from experience. But what else can we really do? Wallowing  feels good for a bit but it gets you no where. One day, you'll be able to look back and connect the dots backwards.

Random Story: Whilst searching for a picture to go with this post, I found out that there's a Steve Jobs quote about this so I decided to use that instead .

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24 comments

  1. Ahhh this was something I had to learn the hard way this year! It's crazy how we plan out our lives down to the last detail - I literally had the age I wanted to get married, first child, everything all decided in my head! But then life throws you a curve ball and you have to regroup. It's a crazy thing, right? I've now learnt to take each day as it comes - there's no need to plan, you'll end up where you're supposed to be. <3 x

    whatevawears.co.uk

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    1. I couldn't have summarized it any better, you hit the nail right on the head Eva! xx

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  2. Great point, I think sometimes you just have to live life and trust that when plans dont work out they are not meant to workout, even if it seems bad at the moment. There is a quote that says if you make plans you are telling God a joke because the plans are not up to you.

    xoxo Falasha
    Bite My Fashion


    Instagram| Bloglovin'| Facebook

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    1. Haha that's such a great quote, thanks Falasha!

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  3. "Life owes you absolutely nothing." omg yes yes yes. // I feel like the older I get, the less I know haha. // I identified with this post so much; thanks for sharing it ^-^ -Audrey | Brunch at Audrey's

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    1. Aw glad you did Audrey, thank you for reading! xx

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  4. It's definitely fun to reminisce about old times! If I had thought my life would end up as it is now, I wouldn't have believed it haha. Though I was always keen on just going with the flow. I never really knew what I wanted to do or where I'd be. The only constant in my life that I ever cared about pursuing was travel! ;p

    -Emily www.coatandcoffee.com

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    1. Reminiscing makes me sad and happy at the same time haha. I really need to learn to go with the flow more often, thanks Emily :)

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  5. It is so difficult to admit that your life now is different from how you thought it would be in the past, but once you're over that, I find that you appreciate what you have accomplished, what you have and who you are now, in the present. Great post!

    Marije | thegfguide.com

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    1. You're totally right Marije! I find that when I stop thinking of what could have been and all that, I appreciate where I'm at a lot more. What an insightful comment :)

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  6. Lovely post! I know exactly what you mean. I have no idea what I'm doing now, but I hope that someday I'll look back and it will all make sense. But I don't believe in God or a plan so probably not :/

    http://colleenwelsch.com

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    1. I hope one day it all makes sense for you too Colleen, thanks for reading! :)

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  7. Having a plan is everything. But what is even greater is the ability to be flexible, to adjust the sails as you captain your life's ship to safe harbors. There is no point looking longingly at the past and at the picture that we had drawn out. Truth is wiping the slate clean and starting all over is not such a bad thing. We live and learn.

    Warm greetings!

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    1. You're spot on, flexibility is really important. It's hard sometimes to not think about the past and all your plans but as you said, what's the point? Thanks for reading! :)

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  8. Absolutely! You never know how your life will turn out, you just have to be ready for anything!
    Adi xx
    fancycorrectitude.com
    instagram.com/fancycorrectitude

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    1. Totally, life always throws curveballs. Thanks Adi! xx

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  9. This is so true. I make plans but I am always flexible and willing to adapt to how things pan out. I believe that if something was right for me it would have worked out.

    www.savingwithoj.wordpress.com

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  10. Steve's quote is perfect there, but you're right. We really can't be upset when things go wrong because more often than not, there's a reason for it and something better comes from it. Life is full of challenge and experiences to make us grow, so often it's inclusive of an amount of suffering in order to help us get where we need to.

    Raindrops of Sapphire

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    1. Love your explanation and I agree completely. Thank you Lorna! xx

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  11. can definitey relate to that feeling back when everything was so much simpler xx

    www.itsleli.com

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  12. I can comfortably say that I have had the incredibly opportunity to connect the dots backwards and it all made sense now. It didn't make sense then but now it does. That keeps me going- knowing that in ten years, I'll have even more dots to connect.

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  13. I always found that Steve Job's quote really inspiring and totally agree with you (even have a similar post talking about reality v expectations). Life owes you nothing but I am a believer in that things will work out best when you have an idea of where you are supposed to go. Of course we need to be able to adapt to those changes in our plans if we want to live a happy life, otherwise we would be disappointed and frustrated all day long! Hope the dots are little by little coming together for you, gal. Much love from Cambridge

    Saida | She talks Glam

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I read and appreciate every single comment. I'll definitely check out your blog. ❤

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