9.15.2017

an overlooked aspect of self-care

Hey people, it's been a quick minute, Two weeks to be precise. Where have I been? Here and there really. In all honesty, it hasn't been the most productive of times but it did feel great to take a mini blogging break. It wasn't a planned one but it was nice all the same.

When it comes to blogging, the pressure to be consistent and on top of your game can lead to burn out and I don't want that to happen to me. Which is why I decided on a whim to take a short break as I wasn't feeling too inspired. It was only supposed to be for one week but due to some editorial issues, I decided to extend it. 

I was introduced to an amazing blog by my friend Chiamaka, if you're a book worm you should definitely check out her blog! She introduced me to a blog called Tales of My Youth and I fell in love with the writing. In one of her posts, she wrote about self-love and how whilst she's perfectly content with her outward appearance, she's not always so in love with her insides. This really got me thinking and inspired this blog post. 

If you haven't heard the terms 'self-care' and 'self-love' in the past year or two you must be living under a rock or something. I actually love that there are so many articles on these things as they are so important. But a trend that I have noticed is that more often than not, self-care tips always involve stuff like taking a bubble bath, putting on a face mask, treating yourself and all that. Now, I would be the first to tell you that I love all these things and actively encourage people to do them as it makes me feel good. But in my opinion, that isn't all self-care should be about, it's an important piece but it's not the whole pie.

Self-care should also involve looking into yourself, spending time with yourself and figuring out the parts of you that need to be worked on. I suppose it's not always easy to point out your flaws but there really is no point deceiving yourself. Look within you and try to identify the things in your character or personality you need to improve. 
For example, I realized this year that I tend to get defensive quick if I feel like I'm being attacked. One time, I actually had to call one of my friends and apologize to her for being so defensive and snappy earlier that day in class. She had made a harmless comment but I got defensive so quickly and whilst I didn't say anything rude, I was unnecessarily snappy. I hated admitting to myself that I get defensive quickly but as I said before, what's the point in deceiving myself? Now that I have learned this about me, I've been able to work on it. I'm not there yet but I'm getting there. 


I believe that we should always be ourselves but it should be the very best version that we can be. Well, that's what I try to do with myself. Taking care of your outer self is very important but your insides are equally as important. Self-care should include getting rid of bad habits and ideologies and improving who you are a person. It is certainly not an overnight thing, it's a process. So this is just a mini-reminder for you guys and also for me to live, learn and unlearn as many times as it is necessary and just continue to grow. Enjoy your weekend. xx

These pictures were taken by the lovely Ausra. Not only is she absolutely splendid at what she does, she also makes you feel very at ease if you're like me and hate taking pictures in public. If you live in the Manchester area, you can contact her by calling 07403315369. 
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34 comments

  1. Great post and so accurate. It is so misleading when people talk about self care as doing things like retail shopping, having a pamper night. It is a part of self care but not the most important aspect of it. What is inside matters the most and if you don't work on that, no amount of baths will fix that!

    Nat ◇ dignifiable

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    1. I agree with that Natalie, no amount of external self care practices will fix your insides if you don't work on them. Thank you for sharing your thoughts :)

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  2. This post is so accurate.
    I have been planning a post about the less obvious acts of self-care that we need to remember, so keep an eye out because thats coming soon. It's great to see other people talking about it too!

    www.seeweardo.co.uk

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    1. Yay, will definitely keep an eye out for it. Thanks for stopping by Jessica! xx

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  3. You look beautiful!

    Federica
    www.federicadinardo.com

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  4. Oh gosh, that phrase "self-care"... It's tiring to hear about it because everyone talks about it, but many of these discussions aren't very thoughtful; sometimes it just feels like a market that businesses capitalise on. You're so right about being the best versions of ourselves. Self-care isn't just about indulgence! -Audrey | Brunch at Audrey's

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    1. Haha I'm also guilty of using the phrase self-care a lot. I agree, it isn't just about indulgence all the time. You're also right when you say that some businesses capitalise on it. Thank you so very much for sharing your thoughts Audrey! <3

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  5. This post feels like it was written for me lol. Lately, I've been doing a lot of self-evaluation and although I may not like every bad habit I've discovered about myself. I'm definitely trying to improve, so I can be the best version of myself .
    Lovely post ! Thanks for the shout out 💜

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    1. Sameee babe, I just want to keep on getting better and better. Thanks for reading and no need to thank me, you know I always shout you out ;)

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  6. Wow, this so lovely thanks for i cherish it a lot FREETUNEZ


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  7. I think I can relate, I can sometimes be quite defensive and snappy have tried to learn over time how to just chill out. Self love/self care and I guess also self development are all very important!

    http://skylish.co.uk

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    1. Yay, someone that can relate! They really are important, thanks for reading Kemi :)

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  8. Pictures are amazing and you look beautiful! Self care is so important yet underrated. We'd all be better versions of ourselves if we just spend a little extra time getting to know us and caring for us! I just love the internal aspects of self care! It's not just about going to the spa and treating yourself!
    Loved this post :)

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    1. Aww thank you Asake :)
      There's nothing better than knowing yourself inside out, it sounds crazy to say but we don't know ourselves as much as we should

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  9. Self care is so important! We underestimate how critical it is so self development! As much as it's critical, it's so misunderstood. Many people think it's all about going to the spa and treating yourself to nice things. 😒. I love focusing on the internal aspects of self care! Focusing on self care has definitely taking me though this conscious path and lifestyle that's giving me incredible happiness.

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    1. I love the phrase you used ; a conscious path. I feel like when we spend time looking inwards, we're able to make a more conscious effort in becoming better people. I hope that makes sense?

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  10. firstly, giiiirl you BEAUTY. these photos are lush. all hail ausra!

    secondly, mmmmhmmm falling in love with yourself first is so important. i've been reading loads of 'self-love' books recently and really trying to work on myself and be a better person so i can glow from the inside out! ♥ there's a lot to be said for self-reflection and the power it has to improve not only the way other people see you but how you see yourself. good on ya, lady, for making a coscious effort to work on yourself!!

    katie. xx lacoconoire.com

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    1. Aw thank you so much Katie, you're too kind!
      I love that- glowing from the inside out. Thanks for sharing your thoughts <3

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  11. This is so important and thoughtful of you. Thanks for sharing. :)

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  12. Everything you said was right. Great post. xxx

    http://whoisvelouria.blogspot.co.uk

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  13. Love this post so much, and I can't agree enough with you! While I love the idea of pampering myself with bubble baths or sheet masks, I think of those more as activities to help me take my mind off the source of my stress...an escape from reality if you will. But unless we do some introspection, we'll never really get to the root of the issues and address them properly. Thanks so much for sharing this insight!

    Jenny | Geeky Posh

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    1. Yess, exactly Jenny! Thank you for sharing your thoughts <3

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  14. I also realized I can get a bit defensive too, not just about me, when I failed someone I love is being attacked too. I try to work on it. Nice post love and you are looking lovely. I especially love the last two pictures.
    ♥️

    www.girleccentric.wordpress.com

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    1. Ooh yes, I can literally feel the hair on my neck rising when someone I love is being attacked haha. Thanks so much Favour, you're too kind. xx

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  15. I have that problem with being defensive sometimes too, sigh
    Lovely post dear, definitely taking some tips from this.

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    1. Hehe feels good to know that I'm not alone. Thanks for reading Sandra, glad it helped! xx

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  16. Very well put! Improving who you are as a person is the best form of self-care.

    Lavanya | Elle Files

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I read and appreciate every single comment. I'll definitely check out your blog. ❤

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